Distance

When I first decided to start up this blog, I intended on posting once a week in order to document my self care journey; both for accountability purposes and to help encourage others to also take care of themselves. However, life doesn’t always go according to plan. Over the past couple of weeks, life has given me reasons to take a step back from my online presence, the first and most importantly being my daughter.

My daughter has been through a lot in the 4 (Almost 5!! What the heck?!) years that she’s been on this earth. I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis just 3 months after she was born, developed OCD around the time she was turning 1, and had to go through her father and my divorce at the age of two. All of that is a lot for adults to handle, let alone someone of an impressionable age. In my opinion, it’s completely understandable that she has some behavior issues from these life’s events, but lately she has struggled with communicating her feelings effectively. This has made spending time with her an even bigger priority than it was before. Thankfully, knowing that she has a strong emotional support system in her home life has helped her to slowly regain her happy, bubbly nature.

The other was the unexpected passing of my lifelong friend, April. I cannot put into words how much this loss affected me. I have known April since the 1st grade and have always admired her individuality. She was bold, unique, and could light up any room that she walked into with her personality. Not only was she an amazing friend, but she was an even more amazing mother. She left behind 3 beautiful kids who I hope grow to be as free spirited as she always was. And while my pain at her passing will fade with time, my love for her and the memories of her never will.

These factors, along with random flare ups of my ulcerative colitis, have made me take time to heal both emotionally and physically, so I can maybe return to some form of normality. (Well, normal for me at the moment, anyway.) And while distance may seem cold and, well, distant, it is sometimes the biggest form of self care one can give oneself.

Introduction: #selflessnotselfish

Hey guys!

My name is Megan and I am a 33 year old mother of two, wife, and daughter, who is working towards teaching herself to love the person she is so she can become stronger and more mentally sound. What do I mean exactly? Well, let me start from the beginning.

When I first created the Meg With Love brand, I had intended to focus on nutrition, food science, and recipe development. The name actually came from a play on the term “made with love” and my name. (Haha…Clever, right? )  Anyway, my motivation for that project lasted only a few months, as I never had the opportunity to work on recipes. This was due to the fact that I struggle with obsessive compulsive disorder, which prevents me from being comfortable cooking or even eating in my own house. (Thankfully, I live right next to my parents so my family and I don’t have to eat out all the time.) Unfortunately, however, this has prevented me from following my passion of becoming a professional recipe developer.

While I have struggled with mental health issues in the past (namely anxiety and depression), I never have felt as mentally crippled as I have with OCD. It consumes every part of my thoughts, especially when I am at home. Instead of focusing on important tasks that I need to complete, I obsessively think over the routines I must follow in order to feel somewhat comfortable in my own skin. This isn’t just taxing on my own mental health, but also those who are important to me. Which is where the new version of Meg With Love comes in.

I made a resolution to myself at the end of last year that I would focus on self care. That I would become a version of myself that not only I love, but is also less of a burden on my friends and family. (The term burden may sound over dramatic, but I’m not naive enough to think that my condition is manageable and reasonable for others to deal with. Thankfully, though, I am surrounded by an amazing group of people who are willing to adapt to this newly formed lifestyle and be there for me, no matter what.)

To do this, I plan on focusing on trying products and other things that make me feel good on the inside and outside. My first self care adventure, was to try and clear up my complexion. I happened across a company called Flawless by Friday, which sold me on their products after just reading the descriptions. If you haven’t already, I’d like to direct you to watch the video at the top of this post. As you can see, I was hooked after the first day. It is now almost 2 weeks later and my skin still feels like satin, even though some of the redness remains. I’m not super concerned about that, as I know that my ulcerative colitis (which I’ll go into more depth about in future posts) causes me to have skin issues. I go into a little more detail on the 5 day mask system on my Instagram , so head on over there to see the final results of my week usage. (I’m waiting on another pack to arrive in the mail so I can do it again and hopefully show you how truly awesome this product is.)

So, there you have it. From this blog to my Instagram, I will be working to show accountability for my efforts and hope that you will also join me in indulging in much needed self care. Until next time, you lovely people! And remember: be #selflessnotselfish because, honestly, who doesn’t need a little guilt-free time for themselves?